** Don't sneeze when you're getting a haircut.
** Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
** If your sister hits you, don't hit her back... They always catch the second person.
** Most school lunches stick to the wall.
** Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
** Never hold a dustbuster and a kitty at the same time.
** No matter how hard you try, you can NOT baptize cats.
** Puppies always have bad breath, even after eating a tic tac.
** Reading what people write on desks can teach you a lot.
** The best place to be when you are sad is in Grandma's lap.
** When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair.
** You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk very long.
** You just can't trust dogs to watch your food.
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